A Happy Hooligan Christmas

Dear Santa, we’ve been very good doggies this past year.

 Really Santa, really we have.   That screen porch we tore up, we were scared by that horrible storm and were trying to get into the house to be with Momma.  She’s wanted to turn it into a garden room, and now she has gotten her wish.   We are sorry she has to pay another year on her truck in order to do it.

 When Mom comes home very late we spend five minutes running around the three acres in the dark to make sure that no rats or boogie men are around before coming to eat. While Mom was watching something called the Iron Bowl, we knew she was in a big hurry to eat back to the game; we came to eat right away and didn’t hunt for vermin.

 Momma decided to make a Christmas card photo again this year.   She got some large Christmas tree balls and hung one around Blackie’s neck and scared her, so she decided against that.  So her plan B was Santa’s hats and garland again this year.  We thought they were rabbits Santa, honest.  We love rabbits, and the big ball at the end looked like a big fuzzy bunny tail.  We couldn’t help ourselves.  Mom chased us around the yard while we were running around with the hats and playing thug of war.   We had so much fun, but Mom seemed a little irritated for some reason.  We think it’s because she is out of shape, and we were only trying to help her exercise.  Honest Santa.  While taking the picture, Mom had biscuits in her pocket and the smell was driving us to craziness. We kept trying to chew them through her pocket and were crawling in Mom’s lap.  Blackie is sorry she got Momma instead of one of the biscuits.   Momma finally gave up and hung the hats and ornaments on her Auburn sign and took a picture.  We promise to poise pretty next time, honest we do. After all we are good Hooligans.

 Momma had a bunch of folks over last Sunday and they all brought rolls of paper with them.  They were yelling War Eagle; we’re number one and bring home the bacon.  We all got excited about bacon. We love bacon.  Then they started throwing the paper up in this tree that Momma was calling a Toomer’s Corner baby.   We got real hungry thinking about the bacon and started wrestling with each other. Usually Mom will come and feed us when we act like we are fighting, but they just ignored us. 

 We never got the bacon, so Santa would you bring us some bacon?  And we want raw hide chews and junk food biscuits, not that healthy stuff Mom give us.   Also bring us lots and lots of toys. Some how we keep loosing our toys. We think the coyotes are sneaking into the back yard and stealing them while we are guarding the front door at night.  And please tell Blackie that when it’s feeding time not to be chasing mice and ignoring Mom.  We are so hungry and we want to eat.  She has all day to chase mice.

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Our Christmas message:

 The Hooligans and I wish you the warmth of home, the love of family and friends.  May you and yours have a Blessed and Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. 

 Patches, Blackie, Levi

Mary.

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4 Responses to A Happy Hooligan Christmas

  1. Anderson, Cathy W says:

    Hi, Mary.

    I loved this post! Hope you and the Hooligans have a wonderful Christmas.

    Best Regards.
    Cathy

    Cathy W. Anderson
    Senior Contracts Administrator
    Process, Power & Marine

    Intergraph Corporation
    300 Intergraph Way
    M/S 135
    Madison, AL 35758 USA
    P: +1 256.730.3697 F: +1 256.730.3300
    Email: cathy.anderson@intergraph.com, http://www.intergraph.com

  2. shoalanda says:

    Soo funny! I did actually LOL!

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